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Purchased at: Trader Joe’s
Price: $1.99 (four bars)

It’s almost summer, which means the days are getting warmer and warmer here in Michigan. And because I work in a kitchen, I’m always hot. When I get off of work, the only thing I want is something cool to eat or drink. Trader Joe’s Fruit Frenzy bars are the perfect cold snack for a hot summery day.

First off, how pretty are these things? The colors are bright and they just look refreshing. The top layer is raspberry, the middle lemon, and the bottom strawberry. And they’re GOOD.

The raspberry section has actual pureed raspberries in it, which means it’s not as smooth and icy as a traditional popsicle. It’s pretty sweet. Now, there are quite a few seeds in this part, because it has the real fruit in it. I didn’t mind this at all – not only did they add a little texture, but it was a constant reminder that these weren’t just corn syrup and artificial flavoring.

The next layer is lemon. This one does not have any fruit bits in it, as far as I could tell. It’s tart. It’s not too sweet. It’s really nice. The best part about this layer is the little part at the beginning where the lemon and the raspberry are mixed together. It tastes like the best glass of raspberry lemonade you’ve ever had.

The strawberry layer is pretty good, but it’s also my least favorite. Again, this one has fruit puree in it, which means it has seeds and little pieces of strawberry. There isn’t anything wrong with the strawberry, but…well, I’m not a big fan of strawberries in the first place.

I am DEFINITELY going to be buying these again. They’re a really good size (bigger than most popsicles), and at only $.50 apiece, they are totally worth it.

5/5

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Purchased at: McDonald’s
Price: $2.00
According to the package… there was no description available anywhere in-store, and the McDonald’s website doesn’t even acknowledge the existence of this milkshake.

I know, I know, I’ve been slacking here lately. I apologize. In my defense, I was out of town for the past few days. That’s part of the reason I bring you this latest review, actually. Mid-roadtrip, I ran into a McDonald’s and saw the sign out front advertising their newest milkshake flavor – chocolate banana.
Of course I stopped in to try one.

I think it’s important to note that I only go to McDonald’s for one of two reasons: late-night McFlurry cravings or hangover breakfasts. I haven’t actually been inside of one in two or three years, so I totally forgot about their plan to make the stores more “upscale” and sell coffeehouse-style beverages. I was expecting to get this milkshake in one of their little white, paper cups coated in wax. Nope. It’s huge! And in a plastic cup, topped with whipped cream and a cherry. And it was only two bucks. I thought it was a pretty good deal, considering milkshakes this size usually cost twice the price at ice cream shops.

It looks like a plain chocolate milkshake, so I was a little worried that I wouldn’t taste the banana at first. That’s not a problem here. Strangely, it LOOKS like chocolate, but I didn’t taste any. The fake banana flavor is overwhelming. And this is coming from someone who loves fake banana flavored things (Runts, Laffy Taffy, etc.) more than real bananas. This milkshake tastes exactly like a cold, liquid piece of banana Laffy Taffy. I was very disappointed and only drank about half of it before deciding to let it melt in my cupholder for three hours. Of course, the fake banana smell also permeated the air and hung around in my car for a few hours, until I finally stopped and threw it out.

I let everyone else I was with try it and nobody wanted more than a sip or two. We were all very disappointed, because chocolate and bananas go so well together, but this didn’t deliver.

1/5